4 years..

There was a point in my life where I remember very clearly thinking.. one week.. I can make it ONE week. Here we are 4 years later. I can truly say, I didn't think I'd ever get here. And I certainly didn't believe that I would be HERE... happy, healthy, safe, healed and in love.

Four years ago today was the absolute worst imaginable day of my life. It was dark, it was lonely, it was scary and it was worse than any nightmare I could have ever feared. I remember it all very well. Sometimes, I wish I didn't remember it at all. March 1, 2008 ended up being a day my life would be forever changed. I would never again feel the same, think the same, look the same or live the same. It was the day I had to decide if this would destroy my future, or shape me into something more than I could have ever imagined for myself.

For those of you who read this who don't know what I am talking about, feel free to ask. I am not ashamed, I am not shy and I am not afraid to share what I have overcome. For those of you who know what I'm talking about, THANK YOU. Thank you for being a part of my life. Thank you for pushing me to places I couldn't comprehend. Thank you for not seeing 'that' when you look at me. Thank you for being patient with me. Thank you for not judging me. Thank you for letting me grow all too fast and all too slow, and heal all too fast and all too slow. THANK YOU.

I woke up today expecting to feel even stronger than I did last year. It took all day for that to happen, but I'm there. I am strong. I am happy. I am safe. I am loved. I am healed. I only could have wished for ONE of those things 4 years ago, and today I am blessed with them all.

Jake, thank you. Thank you for understanding my weaknesses and loving my strengths. I would be lost without your love. I would be lost without your support. And I most certainly would be lost without you by my side for the rest of my life. Thank you.

I am strong. I am happy. I am safe. I am loved and I am healed.